Sticking to the Challenge


Changing yourself is not a test or a competition where the only way is the hard way and only the strong can succeed.

If you want change it’s worth deciding to make it as easy for yourself as you can-

Both tiny persistent changes and short bursts of different activity can give you significant long term results.


What’s this post for?

You will find this post useful if you are doing our challenge or working with the book on your own to improve your relationship with your Monkey.

In the challenge, we specify a 12-week burst of activity for 30 minutes each day to allow you to reengineer your relationship with your Monkey.

Change can be hard.

When we are working to change things, we need to make it as easy as we can to get the work done. This post provides tips to make change easier, whether you are doing the challenge or working with the book.  You can access a number for helpful resources here.

The Challenge mentality

Your goal in taking on any challenge is to change something in a specified period of time; something that will be worth the cost of completing the challenge in time, money and focus. Whatever your reason for reengineering your relationship with your Monkey, be clear on the value of success to you.  The book has a series of exercises that lead you step by step through the process of learning how to work with your Monkey. In the 12-week challenge, we help you manage your journey with a timetable for doing the exercises. Each week, we send tailored email links to guided exercises and resources that are set by the timetable.

Whether you are approaching the process on your own or with some help, here are some tips to keep you on course.


It helps to set up a new routine that makes it easy for you to complete the exercises.

You are more likely to stick with it if you know there is a daily commitment.

If you can set and keep the same time each day or link it to something that already is fixed in your routine:

  • When you get up – first thing in the morning
  • When you go to bed – last thing at night
  • When you stop – around a meal time
  • Choose the best time for you and make it regular.
  • If the slot you original chooses proves difficult, until you find a time that works better.


We all have existing habits. Many less-than-ideal results we have now result from these habits. A quick way to free space for change is to stop doing some of your existing habits now.

A simple exercise is to sit down with paper and a coffee or your own poison and take time to Name three habits you have now that will hinder you from making the change or completing the challenge.  When you name them, take a moment to consider how to reduce or avoid their impact as you work through the book or the challenge.

The reverse of this is to sit down quietly with the mandatory paper and coffee… and Name three existing or new habits that will help you. Take steps to implement or strengthen these habits.

Both these exercises help you manage the journey effectively.

Knowing what you are doing consciously to overcome prior unconscious processes will help you feel confident that you can make the change.

Planning and Organising

In the challenge, we suggest you take the time each week to review your progress, get your scores from the survey, and take the time to plan and organise the coming week. Successful participants found that this deliberate time for organisation paid them back significantly.

Make sure that you set up your environment:

  • Have a place to do the work
  • Have the tools to do the work
  • Head phones / Reference materials / Options for making regular notes.

For those of you who like journaling, this activity will give you great notes. You can also access the Facebook challenge site and share progress, tips, scores, and feedback.

Stay ahead of the programme

Those who are doing the challenge will complete the Monkey Relationship Survey and plan ahead for the coming week on day 7 of each week. Taking a moment to think and plan each week in advance helps you stick with the challenge and ensures your success.

Those working with the book will not necessarily follow the weekly structure imposed by the Challenge and may want to set aside some time every week for a similar review and planning session.

You can find a copy of the recommended 12 week timetable here. 12 week timetable

It shows the exercises fro each week and which days in that week we recommend you do them

On the Challenge we recommend you stick to this plan. For 30 minutes a day for 12 weeks you get a change to reckon on.

If you are working from the book its worth looking at and we would recommend implementing something similar.


Some of us get things done by bribery. If it works for you, do it and diary a special reward or celebration for when you complete the challenge or book. Make it something you will look forward to as a reward when the effort has been made. As a minimum work out what you will get when the change you are after delivers. Make sure this is big enough to help you see the value in overcoming anything involved that takes you outside your comfort zone.  If you can’t do this read our post on Happy Paddock.

Also completing the challenge with a buddy helps. If you are stuck you may be able to find the same type of support on the Facebook site.


Changing yourself is not a test or a competition where only the strong can succeed. If you want change, it’s worth deciding to make it as easy for yourself as you can.

Success is Success even when it’s easily done.

Be gentle and work to your outcomes rather than your tasks. if you miss a session, just get back on track again and keep going. One step at a time will take you on the longest walk.

Useful links

You can also see other helpful implementation resources  here.

If you want more help check out the 12-Week Challenge.

Facebook group for 12-Week Challenge.

Take the Misaligned Monkery Relationship Survey every week to let you see your progress you can access it here